Life Church Message 2008-03-23 - The Standard (Part 10)

The Standard - Mat 5 - 7 (continued)

Divorce and the Exploitation of Women - Mat 5:31-32

Jesus' position more fully illustrated in Mat 19:1-12; Mark 10:1-12

Related Scriptures: 1Cor 7

Exegetical Idea

What are the consequences when a man divorces his wife? If the divorce was for anything other than sexual sin, he causes her and anyone she marries to commit adultery!

Developmental Questions

Explain It: What does this mean?

God's original intention should be our guide - Mat 19:4-6

Context - the "certificate of divorce" is a reference to Deut 24:1-4

This passage regulates a practice that it does not approve (e.g. Deut 22:28-29; Deut 23:18)

Prove It: Is it True? Do I believe it?

God expresses a similar sentiment in Mal 2:13-16

Apply It: What difference does it make? So What?

Husbands must take the lead in protecting their marriages.

Men must protect women rather than exploit them.

Homiletical Idea

Take your marriage covenant seriously - God does!

Purpose

Husbands must take the lead in protecting their marriages.

Men must protect women rather than exploit them.

Protecting Your Marriage

What is marriage anyway?

A covenant of companionship. - Gen 2:18-25

Cleaving - the husband's job

A picture of Christ and the Church - Eph 5:22-33

Men and Women In The Church - Sarah Sumner, Ph.D.

Head / Body - 1Cor 11:2-3; Eph 5:22-33;

Sacrifice / Submit

Love / Respect

Till death - Mat 19:1-6

Your marriage doesn't belong to you only!

Is it better not to marry? - Mat 19:10-12

Don't violate God's picture!

Divorce = decapitation!!!

Whose paradigm - God's or the world's?

Who is greatest? - Mat 18:1-5; Mark 9:33-37; Luke 9:46-48; Luke 22:24-27

Mutual Submission - Eph 5:15-21

Unforced "other" orientation:

Wives submit yourselves to your own husbands

Husbands love your own wives

How should heads behave towards their bodies?

God exalts Christ - John 5:22-23; Philip 2:9-11

Christ exalts us - Rev 22:3-5

Husbands should promote their wives!

Husbands - take the lead in getting help for your marriage.

If either spouse is unhappy, your marriage needs work.

You don't have to talk about your feelings the way women do!

Women sometimes want men to be like them.

In Scripture Jesus reveals his emotions but doesn't talk about them.

Anger - Mat 23:136

Sorrow - Mat 23:37-39; Mat 26:36-46

Feel free to express your feelings through action.

Explain your feelings as they become clear to you.

Learn everything you can about building a successful marriage.

Personality differences affect communication, how we receive love, etc.

Identify and connect with successfully married couples.

Rearrange your life to promote the success of your marriage.

Protecting Women

A man exploits a woman by relating to her in a way that meets his needs without meeting her needs.

Meeting his needs

Sex - using her to gratify your sexual desires

Lauryn Hill - "That Thing"

Friendship - using her to listen to your problems

Rescuing - using her to boost your own ego

My relationship with S. R.

Resources - using her to supply your material needs

"Woman To Woman" - Shirley Brown

"From His Woman To You" - Barbara Mason

Meeting her needs

Affection

Conversation

Honesty, Trustworthiness, Commitment

If you don't have solid relationships with people of your own gender it is extremely risky for you to engage in deep friendships with someone of the opposite gender.

Women are often at risk in their friendships with men.

Be very careful in your relationships with the opposite sex.

Women:

If you want a man to be concerned about how he can please you then he needs to be your husband. - 1Cor 7:32-35

Men:

If you want a woman to be concerned about how she can please you then she needs to be your wife. - 1Cor 7:32-35

Be self-controlled - Tit 2:1-8

If you don't have solid relationships with people of your own gender it is extremely risky for you to engage in deep friendships with someone of the opposite gender.

Women are often at risk in their friendships with men.

Be very careful in your relationships with the opposite sex.

Get married

Marriage is a safeguard against sexual immorality - 1Cor 7:1-7

Prepare yourself to support a wife.

Look for an appropriate woman

Spiritually mature

A faithful friend

A vision that matches / complements yours

Personally appealing to you

Pray!!!

Submit your self to a happily married couple for guidance.

Preparation

Expository Preaching

Expository preaching is the communication of a biblical concept, derived from and transmitted through a historical, grammatical, and literary study of a passage in its context, which the Holy Spirit first applies to the personality and experience of the preacher, then through the preacher, applies to the hearers.

Select the Passage

Study the Passage

NIV

Hebrew Study Bible

KJV

The Message

NASB

RSV

Discover the Exegetical Idea

Subject

Tools: How, Who, What, When, Where, Why

Complement

Analyze the Exegetical Idea

Explain It: What does this mean?

Prove It: Is it True? Do I believe it?

Apply It: What difference does it make? So What?

Formulate the Homiletical Idea

Determine the Purpose of the Sermon

Make it plain

Use accessible language and modern parables

Make sure people do something with the word God gives you for them.

Decide How to Accomplish This Purpose

Outline the Sermon

The Standard - Mat 5 - 7 (cont.)

Resurrection Day

Jesus' Resurrection - John 20:1-18

Jesus appeared to selected witnesses - Acts 10:34-43

Word Is Bond - Mat 5:33-37

Preparation

Misc

This is an area of our Christian life best addressed by life groups.

"what is warranted by what I do or say" - 2Cor 12:6

Exegetical Idea

Subject: Is it appropriate to swear and take oaths to convince people of our intentions?

Complement: No - don't swear at all, just say what you mean.

Analysis

What does this mean?

We want people to believe us.

Why do we take an oath in the first place? Because we lack credibility!

Why do we lack credibility? Our track record isn't strong enough to back up our words!

We think we're OK because we use language that honors God.

Do I believe it?

What difference does it make?

When our words are not believable we are poor representatives of God's Kingdom.

We need to have a lifestyle oriented around the truth.

Homiletical Idea - Let your word be your bond (i.e. word is bond)!

Purpose

Saints will understand the importance of a credible lifestyle.

Saints will understand how to achieve a credible lifestyle.

Passage - Mat 5:33-37; James 5:12

What does this mean?

Examples

Jesus' rebuke to the Pharisees - Mat 23:16-22

"I swear to God"

Don't swear falsely - Lev 19:12

Why do we swear and take oaths?

We want people to believe us but we lack credibility.

Our track record isn't strong enough to back up our words.

We use God to bolster our image.

"Yes" and "No" is the space we should live in.

Bottom Line - Seeking credibility beyond our track record is demonic.

Do I believe it?

I've been there!

Examples of credibility issues: lateness

What difference does it make?

How does this look to other people?

When I'm not credible, what impression do I give of God's Kingdom?

Faithfulness is one of the fruit of the Spirit - Gal 5:22-23

There are 9 distinct fruit - they are not interchangeable.

Some things are distinct

Milk and cookies are distinct, but go well together.

Democracy and freedom are distinct, but go well together.

Love is distinct from faithfulness

Kindness is distinct from faithfulness

Goodness is distinct from faithfulness

When we try to enhance our credibility beyond our track record we are letting the enemy use us. When we let the enemy use us in one area, we endanger other areas of our lives - Rom 6:15-18

We must cultivate a lifestyle of credibility!

Our lifestyle should be oriented around the truth.

Own your track record - be honest about it.

Don't think about yourself more highly than you ought to - Rom 12:3

Don't use "God" language to distract others from your track record.

Planning, honesty, "good luck", and "bad luck"

"The more I practice, the luckier I get" - Gary Player, etc.

"No" is a success word, but you can't say no to everything.

What are your chances - 90%, 99%, 99.9%, 99.99% ?

What's your track record on Jesus?

Yes, yes, or no, no?

Victory, or "I swear to God I won't do that again"?

You need to hang out with believers who are also trying follow Jesus.

Discussion Questions / Topics (based on the indicated scriptures)

Scripture References: Mat 5:33-37, Mat 23:16-22; James 5:12

Describe an area of your life in which you have a credibility gap.

Have you misused God to overcome a credibility gap? If so, say more.

Have you ever misrepresented your track record? If so, say more.

Does your "yes" mean yes and your "no" mean no? How do you avoid yielding to the evil one by going beyond this?

Who is unhappy with you? How does this relate to your faithfulness?

How are you working on the areas where your track record is weak?

How has your track record improved recently?

Witnessing Activities For This Week's Life Group Meetings

Make sure that everyone knows about Life Church 101.

Make sure everyone in your life group has a prayer partner.

Pick a base of operations as a focus for your group's outreach ministry.

Plan a social event for your group to which you can invite some of the unbelievers you've been praying for.

The Standard (Part 10) - Word Is Bond

Pastor Rocklyn Clarke - Sunday March 23, 2008